Life Abroad: Hitting the Reset Button in Paradise

When I turned 24 years old in the late summer of 2018, I started wondering where my life was headed. I was living in Cork, in southern Ireland, where I’d spent most of my life. I had friends, family, a half-decent job, and the comfort of the familiar. But I wanted more. No, I needed more. 

I started feeling weighed down by the gray weather, the endless hustling to get nowhere, and a general sense of stagnation. I was stuck, as they say. And then things got even more complicated. I’d been with my boyfriend for about a year when we learned I was pregnant.

After I had my son Levi, the feeling of stagnation started to turn into a fear of being trapped. Suddenly I could see myself in my 40s, twenty years down the road, still in Cork, finally having some time to myself now that the kids were out of the house.

Is that how I wanted to spend the prime years of my life—biding time? It was not. I knew I needed to get out, to get away. But how, and to where? Dublin offered the buzz of the big city, but it sounded to me like just more rushing around to get nowhere. That was what I wanted to get away from, so I started looking for a more remote, quiet, and relaxed place.

I limited my search to the European Union, since Ireland is a member of the bloc and I knew I could easily establish residence in any EU country or territory. I looked at Greece, but there were just so many islands I couldn’t decide. I looked at Portugal, but the deeper I dug the more popular it seemed to be with international travelers.

I focused my search on the European Union, knowing that as an Irish citizen, I could easily establish residence in any EU country or territory. Greece caught my attention, but with so many islands to choose from, I found it overwhelming. Then I considered Portugal, but the more I researched, the more it seemed overrun with international tourists. As a mother, I wanted to avoid competing with crowds for a peaceful spot at the beach or a seat in a cafe.

Discovering Tenerife: An Island of Tranquility

Finally I found the island of Tenerife, the largest of Spain’s Canary Islands, a few hundred kilometers off the coast of West Africa. It looked absolutely gorgeous, with its long beaches and craggy mountains. Toss in the tropical, mostly sunny climate and the relaxed pace, and it seemed like just what the doctor ordered.

I’d found my destination, but still the idea of leaving everything behind was overwhelming. What would I bring and what would I leave in Ireland? How would I adjust to a new culture? What if I felt isolated and regretted the whole thing?

Despite these fears, we booked our flights to Santa Cruz de Tenerife. As I boarded the plane, I felt myself tingling with excitement: I could sense that I was embarking on a journey that would transform my life.

We arrived in August 2019, and the island immediately started working its magic. The smell of the flowers, the relaxed vibe of the locals, the dormant volcano of Mt. Teide looming over everything—I’d woken up in a real-life paradise.

Surrounded by the endless ocean and a community of open-minded people from all over the world, I began to see life through a new lens. I began to slow down and move at the pace of Tenerife. Nobody here is in a rush. People are mostly focused on enjoying the present moment rather than ticking off items in an endless to-do list.

In Ireland I’d been missing that appreciation of the moment. Instead of rushing from one obligation to the next, I began to savor the simple pleasures—enjoying a coffee at the local cafe, calmly watching the sunset, a slow walk along the beach, engaging in real conversations with new friends.

In just a handful of months, this subtle shift in perspective profoundly improved my mental health. The constant stress and anxiety I’d felt in Ireland gradually faded away, replaced by a sense of peace and contentment. I became a better partner and a better mother.

And I can’t overstate the benefits of daily sunshine. I’d always known that Ireland’s gray weather impacted my mood, but I didn’t realize just how much until I lived in Tenerife. The constant sunshine and warmer temperatures began to make me a happy person, rather than a dour presence looking for something better. The steady stream of Vitamin D, which I was sorely lacking back home, lifted my spirits and boosted my energy.

Being active outdoors everyday—hiking in the mountains, swimming in the sea, relaxing on the beach—further enhanced my mental and physical health. The island’s laid-back nature encourages the right kind of work-life balance. People here value leisure and relaxation just as much as hard work. As a result I began to prioritize my own well-being, something I’d struggled with in Ireland. I learned that it’s not only okay to slow down—it’s necessary.

Living abroad has taught me more about myself than I ever imagined. One of the most important lessons is strength and resilience. Moving to a foreign country where you don’t initially know anyone and don’t speak the language forces you out of your comfort zone. There were challenges, of course – navigating bureaucracy, learning local customs, and building a social circle – but these experiences helped me grow stronger and more adaptable.

I’ve also learned to embrace uncertainty. Life in a foreign country often comes with unexpected twists and turns. Things don’t always go as planned, but instead of being frustrated by these challenges, I’ve learned to approach them with a sense of curiosity and openness. This has allowed me to develop a deeper sense of trust in life and its unfolding.

Finally, Tenerife has reminded me just how much I love and need other people. Though I moved away from my friends and family back home, I’ve built meaningful relationships here with locals and fellow expats. These connections have shown me that no matter where you are, you can build a community and a sense of belonging—you just need to be open to it.

My community here has begun to shape who I am. Nearly everybody in Tenerife is an entrepreneur, building a business or working on their side hustle to create a life they love on their terms. The more people I spoke to about digital marketing and building income streams online, the more friends seemed to want to know more. I decided to create online courses to help people become digital nomads by earning money while on the road. After a few years, they’re now providing me and my family with a steady and growing income and my own small business!

A few weeks ago I celebrated my 30th birthday with a wonderful day at the beach, diving off rocky cliffs into crystal clear waters, dancing to some of my favorite music and just enjoying time with family and friends in paradise. Somehow, this was already my 6th birthday on this beautiful island—a reminder of how time really does fly when you’re having fun.

At one point during that fantastic day I took a minute to look around at the scenery and the people helping me make memories I’ll never forget, moments of laughter and joy from the bottom of my heart. I couldn’t help but feel that I had made it. That I had done what I’d set out to do all those years ago when I was stagnating in Cork, on the edge of depression and seeing my life heading down a dark road.

I was able to take control of the wheel and find a calmer, more vibrant life on a remote Spanish island. I refused to let being a young mom stop me from dreaming big – that determination changed my life, my partner’s life, and my son’s life. I discovered, despite what so many people believe, that it is possible to uproot your life and start all over again.  Consecutive sentence issue rewritten as below

I took control of my life and found a calmer, more vibrant existence on a remote Spanish island. I didn’t let being a young mom hold me back from dreaming big, and that determination transformed not only my life but also my partner’s and my son’s. Contrary to what many believe, I discovered that it’s entirely possible to uproot your life and start fresh.    

The lessons I’ve learned over the past five years have been invaluable, and I wouldn’t trade this experience for anything. For anyone considering a move abroad, I can confidently say—it may just be the best decision you’ll ever make.

Read more like this:  One Family Discovers the Joys of Life Abroad

Enjoying my birthday outing last month, I realized I’d finally settled into the expat life. Seeing Levi laughing and my friends splashing around in the water and the sun blessing us all with its rays, I felt that this new life I’d built had become all I imagined it could be. Could there be anything better than that, being able to live out your dream?

—————
Ireland-born Mia Bowen is a content creator and travel consultant who has been living on Tenerife for more than five years. Learn more on her TikTok and courses page.